Observing the Observer and the False Matrix

We awoke to suddenly discover that what we have known all our life, what we have been taught, what we have observed and what we have believed in represent a very microscopic portion of reality.

We have learnt and interpreted all our life with our 5 senses and with the help of these senses we receive information about the world around us. Eyes to see, ears to hear, tongue to taste, skin for the sensations and nose to smell. Each of these 5 senses sends signal to our brain which the brain miraculously decodes. Thus, we observe the world around us. But it becomes complicated after that. Our observations give rise to another phenomenon, it is known as ’thoughts’ and most of the time, we are puzzled as to where these ‘thoughts’ come from. After all these years of existence and evolution, we still cannot understand where thoughts arise from. Most of the time in today’s world, thoughts are fed into our consciousness and a person absorbs it unconsciously. And these thoughts are where the ‘power’ lies because they become charged, either positive or negative depending on their intensity. Positively or negatively charged thoughts build up and form layers to give rise to ‘emotions’. Accumulated emotions over time become memory and are stored. Some are stored very deep and some on the surface depending on a number of factors. Therefore, perception is born, the single most important factor which gives rise to a sense of existence in this realm. Who is the perceiver?? It is ‘I’ you say and that is correct. Who is the ‘I’, I ask, and the reply comes, it the ‘I’ that has been formed over years and years of perception, the process of which you have described above. Correct, I say. You are the observer and your sense of ‘I’ has developed based on what you have observed and perceived all your life.

But what if you observe this ‘observer’ i.e. this ‘I’? Who are you then? Isn’t that also an ‘I’? You are observing yourself. What if I tell you that the part of you who is observing your observations (from the 5 senses) and not relating or getting consumed by these observations is a higher aspect of yourself. So thus comes the age old saying, ‘The observer becomes the observed’.

And by whom is it ‘observed’? It is that higher aspect of you. To make it simple, let’s give you an example. Suppose information comes to you through sight i.e. you see a new i-phone which generates thoughts in your head, thoughts such as “Finally I have this gadget, All my life I wanted this, Yes now I am in fashion and am trendy, now I can check facebook wherever I go, this device will make my life better”, these thoughts are positively charged giving rise to what we call positive emotions. Perception is born, memory is created and your own self is updated. Now you are a ‘self’ with an I-pad. The question to ask yourself is why and from where did these positively charged thoughts arise from in the first place when you saw the I-pad? Are those your thoughts? Did you even want to think them?

Is it not true that these thoughts have arisen due to a programming of one’s mind? Imagine the extent of thoughts that can be fed into your head if some1 understands how to manipulate the information which you decode with your 5 senses by means of Television, Radio, Media, Education, Corporations, Advertisements and Governments. If you constantly hear “I pad is great, I pad will make your life much better’ and constantly see every1 using them, sleek look, cool features etc etc then the above positively charged thoughts which have been created and are swimming in the air is picked up and decoded by your brain and perception is born. If you think about it, you don’t even have a need for an I-pad but you are made to believe that you need it. This is the False Matrix. Mostly everything you are made to believe in our reality today comes from this false matrix.

It is only when you observe yourself i.e. observe the thoughts and emotions that are there instead of relating or being consumed by them e.g. when seeing the I-pad is when you see things from a higher perspective and understand the nature of them. We live in a false and controlled matrix system where thoughts are created and they swim in the air for our brains to pick up and decode and form perceptions. The media is one of the biggest tools through which we pick and decode thoughts.

Sense or Nonsense?? (The Nonsense poem)

There is the known and the unknown,

Everybody knows the known but few the unknown,

But what if you venture beyond the unknown,

Beyond all that is to be seen, heard and felt by the 5 senses,

You'll reach a place that seems to be nonsense,

And in this nonsense is where there is all the sense,

Sense in the sense that nobody quite knows and senses,

Sense that is yet to be discovered and understood by the senses,

Sense that makes so much sense that sense will never remain the same,

But alas! There is not a one born who can explain the nonsense to be the sense,

And so it will remain, the sense to be the sense and the nonsense to be the nonsense,

But what if the nonsense is the sense and sense the nonsense,

You have one hell of a paradox and conundrum!

Try figuring it out and you'll be out of your senses,

And that my friends is exactly the point,

Am I making sense or nonsense?

That is something you people have to decide…………

A Source for Joy

Early in the mornings when I rise,

I step outdoors and heaven I behold,

Beauty no better can the eyes ever hold,

And nature in all of her glory unfolds.

The fresh air that fills thee lungs,

The vibrant greens of the trees abound,

Melody no sweeter within the bounds,

But of the birds with their cheerful sounds.

The sun shines with his tender rays,

To let the world know that it is a beautiful day,

And it’s a smile with which we should start the day.

The hustle and bustle of the breeze that blows,

Silently whispers in our ears to let us know,

The feeling of being alive as wonderful as one can get to know.

Poetry in motion with perfect symphony,

Is what nature can be best described as,

And a simple act of observing,

Is what can give all of us joy.

Spiritual Realizations

This was written sometime in December 2008.

As I sit here on the banks of the Mae-Kong River, a certain sensation fills up my whole body. I am away from everything, in the middle of nowhere and all I can do here is let go. Let go of everything, the material world does not exist anymore, the past and future both have faded away into nothingness. I just hear and observe my breathing, I feel more aware, more peaceful and more joyous. Nature unfolds herself and I observe her magnificent beauty. Beauty which the mind cannot comprehend. Everything seems so perfect, just the way it should be; synchronized, majestic, balanced and immensely profound. The river in front of me flows calmly, peacefully and lazily with no hurry, the birds sing their melodies and soothes my ears, the rays of the sun brightens up all that he shines on, I hear children shouting and playing in a nearby village, I hear the fisherman’s oars splashing against the water and then there is SILENCE. Not a sound to be heard. I see the ripples in the river; they look so eerie and mysterious. Thoughts seem to have faded away and all I can observe is the PRESENT, the present in all its glory. I realize how beautiful and magical this sensation is.

Thoughts enter my mind and I wonder about life. Here I am, all by myself and it is in times like these that I discover the ‘INNER ME’. The ‘me’ that is hidden away. The ‘me’ that makes me realize the true beauty of life. So much peace, so much joy, so much calmness, I wonder where this ‘me’ always was. Why didn’t it reveal itself to me before? Life, I realize has so much more to offer. In the city, this ‘me’ is lost. The constant struggles, competition, stress, worries and anxieties make life a blur. Lost is the word that comes to my mind, lost in a battle where one knows not what he/she wants and where one is going. All our lives we push and devote all our energies into causes which in the long run seem so irrelevant (understand that these thoughts came when I was there in the meditative mode, the moment) Money, power, fame, fortune, security, do they matter at all? I ask myself these questions. I have been programmed all my life to run around for these pursuits but at what costs and for what gains. I sit here now with absolutely NOTHING. I sit here with no future, no past, no possessions and all I have is myself. What I experience now surpasses every other experience I have ever experienced in my 23 years of existence. I am just at the basic level, just looking inwards at the surface level, I cannot imagine what it would be like to go deep. Go to the depths that exists within me, what would I find then, what revelations? I just realize one thing, “Life reveals itself for what it really is when you look within instead of focusing energy on external factors."

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Here is what I think. The world now and the way it is now, it’s not possible to focus inwards because all of us are looking to survive. Our reality of life is “survival of the fittest’. So it’s impossible to focus and devote one’s energy to spiritual pursuits. But I predict, it will change. A day will come in the distant future when everybody realizes the value of spirituality. For me, I believe that that’s all that matters. So right now, we are focusing only on the material world but someday in the future, material pursuits will take a backseat and the world as a whole will become spiritual. There will be a spiritual culture that will prevail. Let me give you an example to support what I said:

Take yourself back to the dark ages in Europe and travel through time. What was reality for the people then? What was the culture then? Who was God? It was the Roman Catholic Church that defined their reality and culture. What they preached became what people believed. An all powerful God, Heaven and Hell etc. For them life was all about not sinning and praying to God.

But then came Renaissance. The whole culture shifted and reality changed. People realized there is more to life than what the Church preached. People became independent and started to question. Dogmatic beliefs were done away with. Explorations, discoveries, scientific breakthroughs took place in this time period. Nature was studied, the laws which govern the universe was found and soon humans began to realize that he could manipulate nature and use its resources and make life more and more comfortable and reach new heights. So reality and culture changed. But what they could never find or answer was God and existence and some of the integral questions of life and purpose. These took a back seat. Slowly as time progressed, people became more and more consumed in the materialistic world. Industrial revolution came, I.T revolution came since people everywhere devoted all time and energy in making the world more and more developed. What it has so far led to is depletion of resources, intense and unhealthy competition, pollution and a complete disregard of Mother Nature. Face it, WE ARE DESTROYING OUR PLANET.

But it will change. In the next 1000 years or so, people will realize that they have to go back to the roots. Back to finding the answers and truths of life. Back to finding who and what God is. It is then when our culture will slowly shift and everybody will start devoting energy in spiritual pursuits. It might take a catastrophe like a nuclear war (let’s hope not). After that people will soon realize that there is got to be a better way and that better way is the way of spirituality and people will adopt that.

So all I am saying is, right now the world is totally consumed by materialism and all our energy and time is devoted towards materialistic pursuits. That’s what defines every culture in today’s world. but a time will come when people revert back to spirituality. And that will be the culture that defines our reality then. Just my prediction, I might be horribly wrong but my reality and my beliefs are what I have stated above. You might agree, disagree, I chose my reality and I stand firmly by them. Just expressing my point of view, so please don’t get me wrong. 

One last thing, go back to the ancient civilizations such as Sumerians, Mesopotamians, Harappa and Maya. These were very advanced civilizations more than 2000 years back. They had most answers at a time when they had no technology, no equipment, nothing close to what we have today. Yet they were so ahead. What was their culture about? From whatever little knowledge I have, I believe people then focused on spirituality and most of their time and energy were devoted to the spiritual side of life. I cannot comment why they perished but I believe they reached the heights of existence and had most of the answers which we still cannot find today.

We are all one (A song)

As the sunlight fades, darkness’s,

You become blind, can’t see.

Miseries,

The hatred, evils, of mankind,

Open your eyes.

We don’t see the light, truthlessness,

All out there to be seen, observe it,

We are wiping, ourselves out,

Not long now.

Religion is made to, save our souls,

Yet it is destroying.

Mindlessly,

What do we find, to sustain?

To be at peace?

Wars have always been, fought on lands,

Bombs that have taken lives.

Will always,

So how long are, we from the end?

Very soon

Don’t be unaware of the future that we create,

It might be the one, that destroys all.

Lives that we lose are too precious to be lost,

Lives that are yours, to be lost.

The world is what it is by our ways and what we are,

Make it the one to know only love.

Let’s join all our hands,

And discover that WE ARE ALL ONE.

Unite all of the lands,

And discover that WE ARE ALL ONE.

Let’s join all our hands,

And discover that WE ARE ALL ONE.

Unite all of the lands,

And discover that WE ARE ALL ONE.

A lesson to be learnt

Wars have always been fought,
Since the dawn of civilization of man.
It's the survival of the fittest so they say,
When it is in fact, the fittest who ultimately destroy.
That's how human beings are as such,
The fitter they are the more they seek,
Domination n power sets the order of day,
N thus wars are fought n lives are lost.
A lion has power also,
The power to kill ruthlessly n rule,
All the animals that stand below his might.
The power to tip the balance,
Of nature unto his favor.
But never does he seek to do so,
Cause a certain limit he has,
N never once does he exceed,
More then what he needs.
A lesson can be learnt,
From nature n the way it works.

EGO AND SOUL (Realizations from the depth of being)

Well, I am in the mood to write, u know, this feeling which you get once in a while and there is an inspiration to let your intellect speak. It improves my understanding and I really enjoy reading it after it's completed. I'm sending this to you guys even though u might have no desire to read it, but then there is no harm in sending it, is there? U just might like, understand and appreciate it or just dismiss it as pure NONSENSE. So if you want to read it, go ahead or ignore it if you don't want to. It is all about the SOUL and EGO
So here goes…

First of all, I want to share some experiences of mine which I went through during my period of stay in Bombay. I had everything. I had great friends, loving parents, I had a killer place to stay in and in fact there is no better place in Bombay, I had all the time in the world to do whatever I wanted, everybody liked and respected me (though I did some crazy things which I regret), had no pressure to attend college, was passing my exams smoothly with good marks, nobody harmed me, I got to meet a whole bunch of people from all walks of life, I broadened my mind, explored areas which are forbidden by society(Just because society forbids it dosen;t means it s bad or harmful etc etc). So life should have been good and I had all the reasons to be happy. But NO, I was never happy, I was always depressed. I suffered from low self esteem, hated myself, was terribly confused, felt lonely, thought everything was unfair, hated life in general, thought I lacked brains, thought everybody was out to get me, was low on confidence, was paranoid, thought of myself to be useless and I was in a constant state of despair, worry, grief, jealousy, anger and thus totally on the negative side. At times, I was happy but again it never lasted and no matter how much I tried, told myself and looked for support from friends n other circumstances, I was still ruled by the negative and could not come out of it. All my 3 years in Bombay had a similar pattern to it and it seemed to me that my past had also been the same and I will always live life in that manner and I was completely frustrated and I reached a point where I could take no more and reached as low as one could get. I started indulging in SELF PITY and most of my thoughts and conversations were exactly that. I wanted people to feel sorry for me and I kept telling my friends about my pitiable condition (I really appreciate those who listened to my bullshit). N remember, I was a nice guy, never harmed anyone, never intruded anyone's space, never forced my will on anybody, never cheated, every1 trusted me, never stole, never made anybody feel bad or any of that crap and yet I hated myself. I thought of myself to be a bad human being, if not the worst. People wanted to know me and came to me seeking my company and I on the other hand thought I don't deserve to be friends with anyone and never opened up and conversed properly(besides a few with whom I felt really comfortable).

Since everything seemed to have failed me, I started seeking answers and in the process, read a whole lot of books on self improvement, spiritualism etc etc. But I still could never seem to understand and apply anything and I felt like a parrot repeating words without understanding what they hold true for. These books made me feel even worse and I lost total faith in everything and I condemned God and in fact felt like ending my life. All this were in my mind but to outsiders and my friends, I seemed okay and no one had a clue about what was going through my head. They knew I was confused but in the end it became so natural that every1 dismissed it and somehow I coped with it and I could still chill, drink, socialize (with great difficulty) and pretend to have a good time when I was not (Some, if not most of the times were great which I realized later and not at that point of time) So that's how my life was in Bombay, at times good but most of the times bad. I also resorted to meditation and it helped me to an extent but it was still the same. So WHY? WHY THIS ALL THE TIME? WHY? WHY? WHY? What did I do wrong? My head was so confused and so cluttered up that I could never form rational decisions and good judgments. Man, it felt terrible, I even started looking down at my friends and started avoiding them and in fact started blaming them and thought their influence played a part in my misery. Everywhere I looked, I could only see DIRT. I am however blessed with very good INTELLIGENCE n a sharp MIND(it became blunt due to the above factors) which is what saw me through and even though I thought I was STUPID, I did act rationally and knew my limits and took decisions which were actually good .

BUT then DESIRE is an emotion which can SEE you through when it is strong and is a burning one. I had exactly that. I had a strong desire to find ANSWERS and since I hated myself, I had even a stronger one to CHANGE. Exams got over and my college life came to an end. It was then that I slowly found answers and noticed myself changing. It seemed to be happening automatically. My head started clearing up and the darkness was slowly giving away to LIGHT. End of my Bombay chapter.

Well, so far, the above has been just my personal experiences and I must have bored you by elaborating so much about my life and what I went through. BUT it is VITAL for explaining what I have in mind. I found my ANSWER as to why I went through the above and that answer has helped me to change my life and be in the complete opposite of how I was being in Bombay. I will never be in that state of mind again, no matter what the circumstances or situations are. Circumstances 100 times worse then Bombay (don't think they were bad at all) will not result in my state of mind getting affected to that extent anymore. So what is the ANSWER? Any guesses? It is the EGO. Yes, the EGO was the cause of all my miseries and sufferings. I was ruled by the EGO. This EGO made my life hell.

So what is this EGO? This EGO is manipulative and is the cause and result of all sorts of negative emotions. Anger, hatred, jealousy, depression, greed, self pity, bondage, low self esteem etc are all causes of the EGO. This EGO is a mental image which one creates about himself/herself and all its actions are based on upholding this importance. This EGO is constantly looking for APPROVAL and this EGO wants to CONTROL. Any thing which does not satisfy it, results in wrong emotions and the mind is held hostage to it. This EGO was responsible for cluttering my mind. This EGO wants everything to be permanent, is attached to everything and looks at the outside world for satisfying itself. It is based on OBJECT referral and its happiness is based on OBJECTS. It lives constantly in FEAR and will go to any extent to keep the object of reference. It does not like CHANGE and wants the world to be in a particular way so that it GETS what it WANTS and it forces it's WILL on people and looks down at those who it thinks is below its dignity and looks up at those who it thinks is someone and has something. This EGO is the MASK. This EGO controls most of us. The mind is filled with EGO based thoughts. The EGO constantly JUDGES and COMPARES. So, I later realized that it was this EGO that took control over me and since I had no desire for POWER (most of us use our ego for money, fame, power, etc) or anything of that sort, this EGO resulted in my self pity. Cause my consciousness wanted to be pure and my EGO never allowed it and thus caused my suffering and misery. See, how this EGO works. See how it is EVIL. This EGO is not our true nature.

Yet, in spite of my understanding, I have not got rid of my EGO totally but it doesn't control me anymore. Since I live in society, I cannot get rid of my EGO fully. I need it to sustain me. But I command it now and it acts on my will. To totally get rid of my ego, I got to cut off from society and meditate in the hills and then probably, 100% of the EGO will disappear and I will attain super consciousness. However in today's world, it is not possible. So the EGO is very much needed but it should be kept under check.

So what is the opposite of EGO? It is the SOUL. Besides ego residing in the body and mind, there happens to be the SOUL also. This is OUR TRUE NATURE. This SOUL is the son of GOD. This SOUL can be described as eternal (indestructible), all pervading, stable, immovable, ancient, unmanifest, unthinkable and unchangeable. This SOUL has no FEAR, it is PURE joy and love. To discover this part of you, the point of reference has to be the SELF and not OBJECTS. This SELF is connected to NATURE and all its intelligence can be harnessed. This SOUL does not judge and thinks of no one to be below it and no one above it and is humble and wise. This soul results in rational decision making and knows the right action that needs to be taken. This SOUL can DISCRIMINATE between RIGHT and WRONG and according to the situation bases it's ACTIONS. This SOUL is closely connected to GOD. This SOUL makes life purposeful, joyful etc etc. This soul recognizes people as it's same and shares an unique bond with everyone. I still have a lot to understand about the SOUL but I have discovered it to a certain extent. I have noticed that I actually create my own reality and this reality is my creation and not due to circumstances of the outside world. This is the POWER of the SOUL. To discover this SELF, get rid of your EGO and especially emotions such as greed, anger, jealousy, hatred, power (ego based) etc. These emotions can also be controlled by us as we have the power to choose our thoughts and not the other way around. Most of the time, our thoughts are not within our control but they very well can be. This my friends, is the SOUL and my life has changed the day, I opened communication with it. I sometimes feel my soul is talking back to me. If there is a question which puzzles me, I ask and I get an answer. Whew!!!!! Total nonsense, ain't it.

Okay, hope some of you have made it this far. This is my last paragraph. Everyone of you know about the Mahabharata. This Mahabharata has a deep allegorical significance which very few are aware of. Mahabharata represents the battle between good and the evil and in other words, SOUL and the EGO. The Kauravas born to the blind king Dritharashtra (when the mind is born, it is born BLIND) and represnts all earthly desires and the whole clan is represented by greed, power, jealousy, anger, hatred etc. The Kauravas represent the EGO. The Pandavas on the other hand represent the SOUL. Now the Bhagavad-Gita (a must read), explains the full significance of the Mahabharata and gives it the much needed meaning. Now, the battle is inevitable between Pandavas and Kauravas. Arjuna with Lord Krishna as his charioteer gears up for battle. However Arjuna, seeing his brothers and his guru Drona on the other side suddenly loses his will to fight, he suddenly realizes that he has to kill and that also those who he grew up with. His mind goes into turmoil and goes into a complete neurotic state. He loses his judgement, finds everything meaningless and thus indulges in SELF PITY and drops his weapons. Now seeing Arjuna's pitiable condition, Lord Krishna starts his dialogue with him and speaks words of WISDOM. He realized that Arjuna's EGO has got the better of him and slowly hymn after hymn, he makes Arjuna realize his TRUE SELF. The Bhagavad-Gita is a wonderful book and I recommend it.

Enough of the soul and ego. Well, I enjoyed writing. Those who have made it this far, thanks a lot for reading, really appreciate it. Take care and may God bless you.